You’ve already decided the big wedding isn’t for you (good call, btw). You’re planning an elopement that feels more like you and free of awkward seating charts and forced traditions.

But now you’re wondering: what about our family?

Maybe your parents have dropped a few hints, or maybe you’re genuinely torn because you want to celebrate with them, but you also want more of a quiet and intentional day. You’ve already done the hard part, choosing to elope, but now you’re trying to figure out what that actually looks like if you include a few of your favorite people.There’s probably another question floating around in your head – “Can we still call it an elopement if our parents or a few loved ones are there?”
Short answer: absolutely. Long answer: keep reading

Let’s Bust the Biggest Elopement Myth

There’s this old-school idea that eloping means running off to Vegas with no one knowing until the next morning.

But these days, eloping is less about secrecy and more about intention. It’s about having a day that feels like you, whether that means just the two of you or a handful of your favorite people tagging along.

There’s no rulebook. You don’t lose your “elopement” badge if your parents are there to witness it. The beauty of eloping is that you get to choose what matters most and skip the rest.

You Can Have Both: Intimate Moments + Family Time

When couples ask if they can include family in their elopement, my answer is always yes, I’ll be there to help you create a day that still feels intentional and intimate.

The key? Break it up. Create space for just the two of you and time to celebrate with your people. That balance keeps the day feeling relaxed, personal, and not like you just tried to shrink a traditional wedding down to six guests.

When my husband and I eloped, we invited our parents. But we still wanted the quiet, just-us moments that originally drew us to eloping in the first place.

So, we started our day before sunrise, just the two of us and our photographer. We hiked in the dark, watched the sky turn pink, exchanged our vows, and shared coffee on the trail. That morning was all about us, no expectations and no one watching.

Later in the day, we met our families for our ceremony, our dog signed our marriage certificate, popped some champagne, and later had dinner together. It was the perfect mix: private moments that felt deeply personal, followed by a celebration together..

Ways to Include Family in Your Elopement

If you’re trying to figure out how to blend one-on-one time and including guests, here are a few ideas:

• Split the day: Do something just the two of you in the morning (like a hike, private vow reading, or first look), then include family later for the ceremony and/or dinner.
• Keep it small: Even if you invite a few loved ones, keep the focus on experiences (like a picnic, a boat ride, or a family meal) rather than formalities.
• Private vows: Read your personal vows privately, then share a shorter version during your ceremony. That way, you get the best of both worlds.
• Give everyone a role: Maybe your dad officiates, your mom holds the bouquet, or your sibling helps with the playlist. It makes the day meaningful without making it feel like a production.
• Set expectations early: Let family know why you chose to elope and how the day will look. Most people are surprisingly supportive when they understand the why.

Eloping isn’t about who you leave out, it’s about what you keep in. The moments that matter most, the people who mean the world, and the freedom to do things your way.

If that’s the kind of experience you want, I’m here to help you make it happen.